Droppier by the Lake

After Cooler, it appears the Van Buren Boys have two options:

1. Cross our fingers and hope it doesn't rain at Regionals
2. Cross our fingers and hope it rains at CHC, Sectionals, practice, and Regionals

I'm hoping for option 1.

Writing this now, I'm fearing that I'll run out of synonyms for the word "drop." As a sign of things to come, we dropped a pass on the first point of the tournament and continued to fumble with regularity throughout the weekend. As a team, I've noticed we fail to catch easy passes with higher frequency than our opponents, but this past weekend, we did it (to borrow an expression from my mom) like it was going out of style.

So ... why? I have many many thoughts on the matter, but with the growing number of Sub Zero, Machine, and BAT "spies" eying this blog, that information will present itself in a less public forum.

I can't believe I'm censoring my blog, but it's got me thinking that we'll probably only ever see any seriously relevant information trickling down from the Sockeyes and Furiouses of the ultimate world 5 years after it's obsolete.

In addition to the rising stock in Dropsie Corp. (copyright K. Seiler), we had other weaknesses that were exacerbated in the rain, but our defense remained very strong. No doubt, we were the strongest defensive team in Delafield. Hmm, maybe that's presumptuous given that I didn't get to watch Kablammo en route to their Mixed B Division Championship. Regardless, no team outplayed us on defense. I fully expect that trend to continue.

Personally, I played OK. The line: 5 turns, 6 thrown goals, 2 received goals, and (ugh) 0 defenses. The lowlight is that I had 66% of the team's total turnovers early on. My turns:

• Backhand to BJ that did not bounce because I was throwing downwind (stupidity)
• Backhand to Man Crush that did not bounce for same reasons (extreme stupidity)
• Forehand huck that went sideways and directly into the crowd (wet disc, weak grip)
• Backhand huck that floated forever (could have done without the hitting myself on the back swing)
• Backhand huck that got footblocked loudly and theatrically
  

On the positive end, I laid out on O once on an upline cut and caught the disc left-handed (something I'm not all that good at). Again, 0 drops. I shut down a TON of dumps, at least half, maybe as much as 2/3. I never got scored on and the guy I was marking never threw a goal. In the Machine game, my guy only touched the disc once, but it got sent back because he wouldn't admit the disc hit the ground before he caught it.

Awards list:

• Biggest Ho award: Mike Lun, for his inspirational lay out callahan in the Madison game that should have pumped us up enough to make a comeback win.
• Boob award: Becky, for his extraordinary leaving of Milwaukee with all of Gibbs's stuff and most of Smellsworth's stuff.
• Biggest Saver award: Lou, for his outstanding receipt of a "one free chain with purchase of chainsaw" coupon.
• Doege award: Karl Doege, for his notable performance in persistence despite being told "save it for the 18 year olds" and "don't you ever fucking do that to me again" at the bar.
• Lead Foot award: Smellsworth, for his unbelievable speeding down of a hucked disc that looked like he didn't have a chance to D, but did. (Honorable mention: Lou, for getting pulled over by a sheriff after being clocked at 47 in a 25).
• Sport Bean award: Joe Nickels, for his outstanding efforts in defense and exemplary usage of electrolytes.

I have more to say, but this has been in draft format since August 17. It's time to post.

Ding Wop Saved My Life

More often than not, I leave my office around 5:45 to drive home after a long 5 or 6 hour day at the office. Wednesday, August 1, 2007 was one of those typical days.

Quickly, I closed my laptop, threw it in the same backpack that has a bottle of five hundred 200mg ibuprofin tablets, a bottle of Gold Bond, and several packages of sport beans. I then sped up the stairs and into my car. With the radio tuned to 1130 on the AM dial, I hit the road, completely oblivious to the tragedy about to take place.

A few minutes into my ride, I cruised by what at first appeared to be some litter on the side of the road. At the very last second, out of the corner of my eye, I noticed it was a hat. A trucker hat. A BROWN trucker hat. A brown trucker hat with a logo suspiciously similar to that of Ding Wop. I u-turned and then pulled over to inspect it further only to discover that it was INDEED a limited edition Ding Wop trucker hat.

I have included photographic evidence of said hat on the side of the road lying in the middle of a T intersection, exactly where I first spotted it.

I spent a few minutes parking, walking over to it, photographing it, wondering who would leave his Dinger hat on the side of the road. I determined the schmuck was probably from Liquid Assjets.

I then hopped back into my car, still bewildered over the orphaned hat. A few minutes later, someone called in to KFAN to report that a bridge had fallen. It didn't seem like a big deal. It seemed like it might have been a prank of some sort, at least until the producers of the show confirmed that a bridge had in fact collapsed and that the bridge was the freeway where 35W crossed the Mississippi. Or, for those who don't carpool with me on a daily basis, my usual route home. THE bridge that I cross 2 or more times almost every day. Holy . . . shit.

Now in shock of the magnitude of the event, the Dinger hat completely left my mind. Later, though still in shock, it occurred to me that on a normal day, if not for the extraordinary discovery compelling me to pull over, I might have been part of some extraordinary circumstances of an entirely different kind.

In short, Ding Wop saved my life.

Bridge Collapse

I'm safe. But still really freaked out. I usually drive on that bridge two or more times a day -- and usually right about the time it collapsed. This is un-fucking-believable and really scary. More later.

(edit: I just an unauthorized "video" on CNN of the collapse ... good god this is devastating)