Time to Exercise

Hey ultimate players! The club season is right around the corner. What are you doing to get ready?

If finding motivation is troubling you, try stickk.com. Don't be fooled by the mafia sounding motto, it's really just a cool way to give yourself a reward for achieving a goal. You hand over some dough and they give it back if you accomplish your predetermined outcome goals. If not, the money goes to a charity of your choice.

Cool! Succeed and feel good. Fail and feel good!

That is, unless you use what they call an anti-charity, an organization whose ideals you oppose. Knowing your hard earned cash could end up in the hands of someone like Frank H should get you doing those extra 20 push ups or that extra set of stairs.

The site probably appeals to ultimate players on a greater level than the general public considering referees are optional.

What a brilliant idea. I should have become an economist.

Of course, if you think that kind of motivation a little too outside-the-box, you can always try something more conventional and mainstream, like the Hawaii Chair (NOW $293.96, shipping included!).

Vegas

I wondered if playing an ultimate tournament would change my sleeping habits.

They didn't.

I wondered if I'd be able to leave the 5/10 table at the Bellagio poker room in time to make it to the game on Saturday morning.

I was! But only with enough time to get an hour of sleep.

I wondered what it would cost to have a stripper meet me in a field at 10:00 on a Saturday morning wearing a cheerleading outfit.

Too much.

Saturday, despite being out of shape, having had just one hour of sleep in an uncomfortable chair, having had no breakfast or lunch, and having been dehydrated, I performed better than any day than I played wearing a Van Buren Boys jersey. That fact no doubt reaffirms the Becky/Lou conspiracy, which I'll expand upon in a future post.

Sunday, I had another good day, not as good as the first, but still good.

I had a deep D, one on one, on Hector. I was on the force side, not guarding him, and a huck went off and I tracked it down, muscled for position, and knocked it out of the air with my left hand. I also D'd up Chicken with a half layout on an upline cut to the break side. "Oh, nice D," he said. I did not expect to hear him say that. Especially after receiving a "I don't think so" and a chuckle when I proposed a VBB/Bravo jersey trade to him back in October.

I got scored on twice on the weekend, both were really nice hucks that needed the back line to be toed by the receiver. No thrown goals allowed.

I also had as many point blocks this tourney as I had all season with VBB: two. One was after one of my two turnovers (a bad OI 30 yard throw) on the weekend. The other was against the Colorado squad on game point.

My other turn was into a really good poach by Pokey. And by really good poach, I mean really bad clear by a receiver on the break side. Pokey still made a nice one handed catch D.

I also had 0 drops and 1, maybe 2, nice grabs. 3 thrown goals, 2 received.

Red Bullsworth made the best play I've seen him make yet, with a nice layout, belly flop, painful-looking grab on the break side. It topped his previous best play of eating 4 pounds of lobster by a small margin.

Also, you may have heard that the Monte Carlo went ablaze on Friday. A teammate exchanged these texts with Ells:

Oosh: The monte carlo is on fire dude!
Ells: Literally or figuratively?
Oosh: It's burnin up man!

Thanks, that really cleared things up. When we saw the smoke billowage ourselves, it was finally clear that Oosh hadn't been talking about the dance floor.

On my favorite topic (stupid misunderstandings of the rules), one player called violation this weekend for the apocryphal rule about not being able to speed up your pace as your walking the disc up to the goal line (Rule X.A.). I hate this misconception, but it's one of the biggest. Please, if you're reading this, tell 5 ultimate players that this is not a rule and ask them to tell 5 players as well.

After the point, I was talking with the guy about it:

DB: I'm pretty sure it's a rule.
Lou: It's not. I'm not pretty sure, I'm sure.
DB: Well, I'm pretty sure.
Lou: That's not sure enough to make a call on the field.
DB: It doesn't matter, I guess, because I just fouled the guy anyway to stop him from making any play ... so it's a wash either way.
Lou: You do realize that fouling intentionally is against the rules?
DB: Yes. So?

Ugh. I just walked away at that point.

In one other interesting moment, the Colorado guys hid one of their defenders on the sideline after pulling, making our team believe there was a receiver wide open in the endzone. Upon the huck, the defender easily jogged out to D the disc. That's just dirty.

I like it.

Vegas in Trouble

Now that Papagiorgio is officially going to the club tournament in Vegas this weekend, they have renamed it Vegas in Trouble.

Updates to the logo are forthcoming.

We're having a party at the 4000 square foot mansion we rented. Pools, ultimate players, Ellsworth, Nickels, Vegas. Debauchery guaranteed.

The cultimate guys are staying with us, which is gunna be a blast.

This will be my first real PT since winning Club Nationals. The knees are really no better than they were all season. I've tried doctors, medication, and physical therapy. I'd try prayer, but I've heard it requires kneeling, which seems counterproductive.

I've never gotten a single good night's sleep in while in Vegas. I wonder if playing a tourney will change that. I wonder if I'll be able to leave the 5/10 table at the Bellagio poker room in time to make it to the game on Saturday morning. I wonder what it would cost to have a stripper meet me in a field at 10:00 on a Saturday morning wearing a cheerleading outfit.

The Stiff Arm

Watching the AFC Divisional Playoff, I just saw San Diego running back Michael Turner give Indianapolis free safety Antoine Bethea one hell of a stiff arm. Is there a bigger "F You" in all of sports?



Check out the Best Stiff Arm Ever.

In ultimate, there's the "sky," but unless your receiver's name is Beau, the defender is usually merely an innocent bystander. In Basketball, there's the dunk, but again, generally the defender is victimized by mere proximity rather than direct application of the maneuver.



ETA: ESPN home page had a photo of the same event on their home page, but a slightly better image than my photo of my TV: